Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Hey, Just a Question(S) For You

So, vacation.

It's going really well. Our drive out was uneventful, except for the KICK ASS bouncing pillow we discovered (on exit 402 on I-90 in SD, in case you find yourself making that drive), when we pulled off the interstate approximately 25 seconds after pulling onto the interstate so that my husband could "drug up".

(He's a diabetic.) (We had just stopped for dinner.)

(It's all legal, I swear.)

Anyway, bouncing pillow. It's like a tennis court sized trampoline at some dinky campground, and the mo-fo can BOUNCE. I nearly launched Marin to the moon, yo. Anyway, it was a great, energy releasing break, and I wish I had grabbed my camera. Certainly we will stop there again.

I was not at all looking forward to coming here, which is an unusual break from my normal "omg I have butterflies in my stomach I can't wait It's going to be so much fun" attitude before we leave. This time I was emotionally tired and not feeling like using any of my energy reserves on dealing with family for 10 days.

But. Being here feels like a nice break from everything. There are always extra adults around, and THE AIR HAVE I MENTIONED THE AIR? It's so fresh and clean and pine-y smelling. At night, the temps drop (lately to the 40's!) and the crisp night air makes me feel calm and peaceful.

Also, I've had TWO orgasmic grocery store experiences here, plus a really successful clothes shopping trip, which I was able do BY MYSELF. This along with the biking, hiking, boating, site-seeing ETC, and things are stacking up quite nicely.

Oh, hey, I started writing this to ask you this question: If you had to give up either sex or hot water- for the rest of your life- which would it be?

(OK, FINE, I got that question out of my mom's Good Housekeeping magazine, so SHUT UP. It's still a good question.)

I think I would give up sex. Because I use hot water every day. And in the winter, sometimes a hot shower is... well, it's part of my Survival Technique: MN Edition. But then again... never to have sex again... I JUST DON'T KNOW.

Question, Part 2: So say you chose to give up sex. The next part of the question is: would you give up hot water or laughter for the rest of your life?

I'm asking you because David refused to play. His answer was a) I'd move to a different country or b) I'd give up neither.


Friday, July 11, 2008

I'm About To Drive 550 Miles In a Minivan With Three Kids, So Have Some Grace For Christ's Sake

*Tap, tap, tap* Is this thing on?.... Anyone there?????......

Didn't think so.

But I'm going to go ahead and announce the winner(s) of my PIF contest, and I KNOW it's a tad bit late, so pipe down. I've been busy over here, remembering creepy things from my past that were previously buried in my psyche and feeling very raw and unfocused. Also, watching LOST.

In fact, if I were to be completely honest, the only reason I am blogging at all is because my alternative is packing. And there are no new Lost DVD's from Netflix.

(I just barfed a little in my mouth.) (About the packing.)

(We are leaving in a few hours for South Dakota, and my husband will be home soon, and we have a date to have a pre-vacation FIGHT which will NOT be helped by the fact that I am seriously frustrated WITH MYSELF for not getting as much done this morning as I wanted/needed to.)

So... winners. I have to admit that I thought of skipping the whole Random Number Generator and just.... picking some numbers out of my ass. But then I thought I'm not very random, and I'd probably pick some of my favorite numbers, and that just not fair. So um, hold on while I try to find this so-called website that will pick for me....

Scratch that. I found Random.org and fuck if I have time to figure out which number generator I need. Bitmap generator, sound generator, playing card shuffler... Also, I don't want and explanation of the "fuss about true randomness", ok? I JUST WANT A WINNER.

So instead I just asked my five-year-olds to each pick a number. And if that's not True Randomness, I don't know what is. We are talking about a couple of kids who moan incessantly about the scrapes on their feet as they ride away from me on their bicycles, barefoot- which is how they got scrapes on their feet to begin with FOR THE LOVE OF LARRY.

So our first winner is entrant number 10... Mimi All Me. Congrats! Shit, now I have to email you before I go.... *SIGH* Guess this means I'll have to put of packing a little bit longer.

Also, I won a contest from Erica at All Dressed Up, and I think it's been Well Established that these contest things are not my strong point, so instead of hosting another contest, which would probably happen on the Eve on Never, I'm just going to pick a second winner.

My second winner is number 20... Miss Sassy Pants. Oh SHUCKS. More emailing, less time to pack ETC.

Completely unrelated to contests, I've been loving hearing about every one's pubic hair. I am accumulating so much data- it seems everyone I've asked has asked their sisters/friends/cousins... I've learned so much! Also, I'm doing alot more gazing at my own, uh, you know.

Also, many of you pointed out that perhaps MY past life would reveal a death via dental chair, and while YES that's a good theory, I'm pretty sure, no I'm positive, my fears are a result of happenings in THIS life. (See also: sadistic motherfucker.)

Lastly, I was finally able to cash in on some birthday sex last night, after spending the last several days AVOIDING it due to the state of my husband's intestines and wanting to avoid any/ALL fecal disasters.

I know, what a lovely thought.


Hey, winners, I'll be shopping for you while I'm in SD, so let me know- would you prefer miniature Mt. Rushmores or stationary featuring jackalopes?

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Pay It Forward Contest

Ok, so Swistle has all the rules over here.

Leave me a comment before midnight on July 4th. I (well, RANDOM NUMBER GENERATOR) will pick a winner and announce it by Monday. (If you don't have a blog, that's ok too. Swistle has it all figured out how you can play too- go here for details.) (Hey, she already spelled it out, and better than I would have done... why reinvent the wheel?)

So for you comments, I'm wondering- when was the last time you were really embarrassed/humiliated? You can just leave the date or time or whatev., but there will be bonus points (from me, not for Random Number Generator) if you include details.

OK? I'll go first, even though I can't win my own contest...

I was recently really embarrassed/humiliated when I had a panic attack at the dentist's office. Twice. In one week. I'll have to post more about that later, but for now I have some contests to enter!

(Go to Swistle's for the complete list.)