Thursday, June 14, 2007

Sharing Custody... of the Grandkids

Last May, my dad moved out of my parents' home suddenly, without my mom knowing, and in with his girlfriend. His girlfriend was someone who had spent time with BOTH my mom and dad. He was carrying on, right under my mom's nose. Jerk. It was a shock, but also, it was a the elephant in the room for such a long time that it was also a relief, for my mom and my siblings and also me. Also, let's say also, again. Also.

My 2 brothers, my sister, and I were all very upset with our dad. I mean, duh, right? My parents exchanged a few not-so-nice dialogues in the days following The Move, and about a month later my mom filed for a divorce. It was a clean break, no wavering back and forth, but it took awhile for it to sink in. My parents quit talking to each other. Completely. That's normal, right? Living together one week, not speaking EVER AGAIN the next? My dad was all like, well, at least you didn't end up Latchkey Kids... Because I guess he's Noble Father for screwing around on my mom all these years but not leaving her for the children's sake.

Anyway, they had not spoken or seen each other in a YEAR, until this May when a funeral forced them into the same vicinity. I looked across the lawn at the grave site and saw my parents hugging. It's about time! You've got 4 children and 4 grandchildren together, so let's just try to be adults, shall we?

So when my mom took Kate and Joan home with her, I was naturally curious how things would go between the Grandparents. My mom took our van, and my dad was meeting David halfway today, so this meant he would have to leave my mom his vehicle, meet David, and drive my mom's vehicle back. And then switch vehicles with her. AND he would have to arrange get the girls from her, pick them up, etc., all the while acting like a decent human being.

Holy Guacamole, Batman, they can interact without fur flying. It's funny, and not funny ha-ha, how a funeral, or little children, can bring people together in a way that other attempts will not. It's not that I want my parents to get back together (in fact, I don't think they should), but they need to be able to be in the same room, ya know? I mean, I'm willing to have 2 birthday parties or whatever, but it's kinda hard to talk the minister into two baptisms for the same child. Or two wedding ceremonies for the same couple. Plus, it was making me tired... and self-righteous.


This weekend we are going camping with a group of friends. There will be 8 adults and 7 children under age 5. And 3 dogs. But there will be communal meals, and campfires, and dirty exhausted children collapsing into bed without a peep, and Adult Conversation. Also: boating, hiking, and Laying On Our Asses. (I'm being optimistic and bringing both a Sudoku book and a book to read.) I only have to cook 1 meal in 3 days, and since David is Fire Chief, and since I'm planning pizzas in those nifty sandwich maker thingies, it'll probably be David doing the cooking. What? That's fair. It is! And the other wives will be jealous they didn't think of it.

Maybe I'll post pictures. Oooo, the unveiling of the Green family...


Shauna said...

Glad your parents are being adults about it. Now.

I'm jealous...
dirty exhausted children collapsing into bed without a peep and adult conversation

Jennifer Playgroupie said...

Great news about your parents being adults!

Adult conversation and laying around on your ass! Wow! Count me in!

Mommy Brain said...

Glad to hear your parents are growing up. LOL on the two baptisms. My Inlaws don't like my parents so we have three birthday parties. (one for them, one for my family, and one for friends because otherwise whichever party our friends are invited to is the "real" party.) I don't recommend it.