Answer

When the phone finally rang at 4:30 yesterday afternoon, I already knew that I had mastitis. The nurse explained to me that "it couldn't possibly be", tried to explain it as a rash, and reluctantly made me an appointment for 9:45 this morning.

I was slightly feverish, achy, and had red streaks on my breast. I went into work (easier than staying at home, sometimes), and felt worse and worse at the minutes ticked by.

Urgent care got me right in, promptly diagnosed me with- yep!- mastitis, and sent me on my merry way with a prescription and an appointment for a follow-up visit. You know, JUST IN CASE. (Insert worries about Inflammatory Breast Cancer here).

I could barely even hold my own head up while waiting for my drugs at Walgreens. By the time I drove 30 miles home- through gawd awful fog- all I could think was bed. Bed bed bed bed bed.

This morning I was so. much. worse. Even with 2 doses of the antibiotic coursing through my veins, I literally couldn't even sit up for more than 5 minutes. Now all I could think was die. Die die die die die.

I have not breast fed Marin for nearly 20 months. (Insert jokes about secretly breastfeeding my husband here.) Even so, I still presented with a textbook case of mastitis. Only, this time it was much worse than when I had it before, probably because I had to wait ALL. DAMN. DAY. yesterday to get medication.

(Thank you, dr's. office, for your prompt reply!)

My favorite part? Calling the nurse back this morning and explaining I needed to cancel my 9:45 appt. because I was TOO SICK last night to wait until today. And then telling her that YES I DO have mastitis. Her response? "Well, urgent care must see more of these cases than we do." Oh, yes, I'm sure they do, YE WHO SPECIALIZES IN WOMEN'S HEALTH.

And actually, my OB/GYN office is usually golden for patient care. Which is why, when they drop the ball even just a little bit, I am shocked. Because they are supposed to be (and usually are) perfect! The fact that I felt like I had been hit by a car could have been making me a teensy bit crabby as well.

Anyhow, Marin is safely installed at her grandma's house. I've been upright for the past 30 minutes. And I even canceled my FedEx supply of cyanide pills.

I think I'm going to make it after all.